Space for Softening [into Strength]

Cultivate nervous system safety and reclaim your needs – to slowly start trusting yourself again.

I'm looking forward to meeting you.

With love,

Rahel

A Map Back to Your Body:

Your ability to sense, feel, and name what is happening inside your body is crucial for arriving in the present moment. It helps you meet life with trust and curiosity – rather than overwhelm. By gently tracking these sensations, your nervous system can also release and integrate stored stress instead of staying stuck in old survival patterns.

1:1 Guidance

My approach is rooted in Somatic Experiencing®, the VITA™-Sex Love Relationship Coaching method and my own lived experience. These intuitively guided sessions empower you to release mental, emotional and physical patterns, reconnect with your body's wisdom, and cultivate a deeper sense of peace and connection with yourself.

Learn More

This is for you if you:

are tired of overthinking.
understand your patterns intellectually — your body still reacts the same way.
question and doubt yourself kind of chronically.
struggle to say no without guilt and often override your own needs.
often feel restless and exhausted at the same time.
ong to feel safe and secure in your relationships.
wish to build courage and self-trust from the inside out, beyond “work on your mindset.”

You don't need to be ready. Just curious.

"People say that what we’re all seeking is a meaning for life.

I don’t think that’s what we’re really seeking.

I think that what we’re seeking is an experience of being alive, so that our life experiences on the purely physical plane will have resonances with our own innermost being and reality, so that we actually feel the rapture of being alive."

— Joseph Campbell

Recent Blog Posts

If you feel abandoned by the world...

If you feel abandoned by the world, Can you imagine your mother standing on the left behind you, supporting you, putting her hand on your shoulder, can you feel her love? And your father on the right, supporting you? Can you feel his strength? Can you remember a moment when your mother held you, where you felt supported by her? Can you remember a moment where your father did that, where you felt his support, his strength? And if right now this doesn't come easy to you, maybe

7 days ago2 min read

Masculine/Feminine Energies and the Nervous System

Also building nervous system resiliency and regulating is a habit. A habit that requires dedication, a certain structure, in which we feel safe.

Mar 304 min read

I almost forgot... that this was the whole point:

What brought you to Bali? Here's a little of my story.

Mar 284 min read

Joseph

Rahel’s grounded and attuned presence helped me stay anchored as we explored long-held patterns of hypervigilance and judgment around my body. From our very first session, I was surprised by how naturally I could move through layers of chronic pain and tension, accessing moments of bliss and safety throughout my system. Her gentle guidance has helped me begin to trust my body more deeply, and in doing so, open a more compassionate and loving dialogue with myself.

I made more progress in this one session than in the seven with my former therapist. Just got home and feeling the most calm I've felt in a long time.

Jesse

I had my first session with Rahel the other day. We were 15 minutes in before I realized we had already started. Rahel’s quality of presence was so natural. I felt like I was just having a good conversation with an old friend and yet the session was profoundly therapeutic.

I had no idea what to expect going into this session. I definitely did not expect to shift a major internal dynamic that had challenged me for 2 years already. Wow. I left our session feeling so much lighter and relieved about an old relationship dynamic that was no longer serving me.

The coaching experience with Rahel was amazing. I felt very comfortable and safe with her. I was able to take away many insights in a very short time. I experienced a lot of healing and gained valuable tools and strategies that I can use in my everyday life. I also gained new perspectives, learned to recognize my own worth, set boundaries, and now feel and see myself as a queen, etc.

If you feel abandoned by the world... 🪷

If you feel abandoned by the world,

Can you imagine your mother standing on the left behind you, supporting you, putting her hand on your shoulder, can you feel her love?

And your father on the right, supporting you? Can you feel his strength?

Can you remember a moment when your mother held you, where you felt supported by her? Can you remember a moment where your father did that, where you felt his support, his strength?

And if right now this doesn’t come easy to you, maybe you envision your father’s father supporting him. Feel the strength that he passed him on. Feel his mother’s love supporting him...

...and your mother’s mother – your grandmother – supporting your mother, loving her, and your mother’s father supporting her. With his strength.

Can you feel the love and the strength your parents have for you? And their parents‘ love and strength for them?

Notice what’s happening in your body as you feel this support. Stay with it a little if it feels resourceful.

And if this whole imagination and tuning into bodily sensations hasn’t come easily to you – or doesn’t feel resourceful – then I’d love to support you.

Because much of trauma happens in relationship.

And that cannot be healed easily alone.*

❤️

I love you, my mother. I love you, my father.

„We all have guilt towards our parents. Because they gave us life. We cannot pay back. We can only pay forward. The only way to deal with this guilt is through gratitude. Gratitude that they gifted us this life.“ – I hope I quote my Somatic Experiencing teacher and mentor Dennis correctly. Thank you.

*some form of co-regulation may be needed – even if it’s subtle:
- another human
- a felt sense of being held (like in the visualization above)
- nature, spirituality, something larger
- or even an already internalized sense of “I’m not alone with this”
Find out what works for you.

😘

Save this for later. [it‘s also in my blog]

Reach out if you’d like to work with me – have doubts or questions, want to share anything that moves you.

Oops! I sat down to simply write some thoughts about the importance of small actions to see change – also when it comes to nervous system regulation tools...

…and then it turned into a kind of essay about fem/masc energies, and how the nervous system – not just the tools – itself benefits from habits, a healthy structure.

You can read more in www.sensitivityofpresence.ch/blog (🔗 is also in the bio).

>> don‘t forget to download my somatic mini-guide „A Map Back to Your Body“ if you‘re curios about nervous system safety + getting to know yourself and your needs/trusting yourself.

I‘m curious to hear from you and delight in emerging conversations 🙌🏽

A little about me 🖖🏽 [and „A Map Back to Your Body“ - a free somatic mini-guide - 🔗 in bio]

Having once worked in journalism and later as a representative of Swiss business interests in Eastern Europe and Central Asia, I realised two things:

• First, that my life looked glorious on the outside, yet still felt shitty inside.
• Second, that what happens in politics—on a national and global scale—is less about improving the world and more a product of deeply individual human dynamics.

Dynamics I didn’t want to be part of. What I experienced, disillusioned me and I knew, the biggest contribution I can do to humanity is to find peace with myself.

I’ve been immersing myself into all kinds of approaches over the past 11 years: Therapy, yoga, singing, dancing, bodywork, energy healing, ayurvedic medicine, and what not.
Eventually I trained as a coach and somatic therapist as it’s always been a – once seemingly unattainable – dream of mine to work individually with people seeking mental (and thus emotional and physical) wellbeing.

Having a very open energy body, being easily excitable and equally influenceable 😎, it’s been essential for me to learn how to root myself in my body, to acknowledge my needs, and to trust my intuition – my path.

Working with the nervous system and going to the depth by renegotiating trauma – has been working very well for me.

It is my pleasure to share my journey and accompany others on theirs – by cultivating nervous system safety and reclaiming their authentic needs.

I created a somatic mini-guide „A Map Back to Your Body“ for you which includes
• a fundamental ORIENTING practice for an increased sense of safety in your nervous system
• a SENSATION VOCABULARY that helps you in tracking your physical experience and hence connect to the present moment, here & now.

Comment 🖖🏽 & I send you the link (which you also find in my bio 🔗)

Love,

Rahel

Feeling safe in the warzone 🖤
[>> yesterday‘s blogpost, read via link in bio]

„In the present moment - we were safe. Even when the alarm on our phones showed up, telling us we need to go to the ground floor because an attack is looming - we were still safe in this present moment.“

What a beautiful reminder by a peer of mine of the Somatic Experiencing studies.

On their way from Europe to India to start the next training module with us, the war started - and they were stuck in Dubai for 1 week.

She studied, practiced hands on – on herself and her immediate environment – what being in the present moment really means. What feeling safe inside means, when so much outside is uncertain and unsafe.

I have not personally experienced a war. My bones probably have, my cells, from ancestors of mine. And then, if I extend the definition of war - I am certain my body knows what war feels like…

>> if ur curious to read… tap link in my bio, and I‘ll be so happy to hear your reflections

🖤

Pic no 1: I took years ago in a temple in Sri Lanka
Pic no 2: a quote hanging on a wall in the ashram we happen to have our somatic experiencing training

On Saturday morning, pretty out of the blue, I had the impulse to write on tumblr again. After 15 years! I realize I’m somewhat tired of Instagram. Ha and I read tumblr has actually been having a comeback recently, is it true?

Anyways, I like it - it‘s algorithm free, allows lengthy texts wherein I can directly share links to books, podcasts, music etc. People are more interested in art and authenticity rather than selling something, it seems.

So, I sat down and wrote a first entry. It’s on instagram/performance (in various areas of life)/talent/free expression/a book I’m reading (“Atomic Habits”)/ another one I binge-read within 24 hours @sophiamolen - and comes with a video of monkeys 🐒 that visited us in the cliffs of Uluwatu on a Balinese-New-Year-Getaway with @tendermind.ch this week: “I’m tired of instagram [and the parts of me it brings out]”. >>link in bio

On Sunday, my fingers again danced with the keys of my laptop! It flowed so freely! This one is about things that have been moving me as well as many girlfriends of mine a lot lately: Women/anger/the (dis)connection with our bodies/romances in which we suffer/ shame/chronic self-doubt: „Women who chase men“. >> link in bio

Also, I want to share that I offer 1:1 guidance (I‘ll be allowed to call myself officially a Somatic Experiencing Practitioner in November once I graduate! After 3 years studying, applying, receiving - whoop!) still, with ever increasing wisdom 😎. Let’s find out how many sessions the intention you bring into the container likely needs? >>book free intention call via link in bio

I’ll be happy to hear from you - also your reflections on my tumblr-entries! Comment there or dm me here.

Thank you.

Take care,

Rahel

Regaining Agency - Choice

I have an opinion:

In my experience, for some of us, the intentions, mindset-shift and growing pattern-awareness tools that are commonly proposed - change close to nothing.

At least it‘s been for me like this. I did the coaching program, the mastermind, the talk therapy, answered the journaling questions, and listened to spiritual teachers… yet none of these really landed.

Why? Not because I didn‘t try hard enough. But because I went through the day COLLAPSED.

This is a nervous system state where the person has no sense of agency, self-worth is low, things seem hopeless, the reality looks like: I DON‘T HAVE CHOICE. I CAN NOT.

It is my conviction - stemming from my experience, from that of my clients and from what I get confirmed in my studies… that we have to work with the NERVOUS SYSTEM if we want for any of the above - beautiful and very valuable pep talks, mindset resets and intentions - to have an effect on us.

The nervous system needs to build RESILIENCY
- which comes from teaching ourselves what it feels like to feel SAFE. Safe in the body - not just as a concept.

I feel greater agency and am celebrating that I‘ve just signed up for a program that is intended to support me in my action-taking. I haven‘t been feeling enough resiliency in myself for something like this until now.

🙏🏽❤️

Btw: this state of colllapse, freeze can come along with a restlessness and hyper-activity at the same time. It‘s called functional freeze.

If you wish to receive my 1:1 guidance which feeds your natural confidence, your sense of connection and intuitive, embodied actiontaking - reach out or check my website, I offer packages too.

Sensual Sundays starts March 15th.

low self-worth / feeling lonely / heady —> reconnecting with your natural confidence / feeling connected / embodied.

==> more info see link in bio.

blending somatic experiencing, VITA- se* love relationship coaching tools, authentic relating, nervous system work, trauma resolution & my own lived experience.

I wanted to ask a friend: “how do you feel today?”

And then thought: a better question would be “how are you feeling in your body today?”

Because it’s soso relevant to check in with how our body feels!

Emotions can take us into a spiral and thoughts too can bring us into a loop - body is just real.
Reliable, and raw.

Today I asked myself this question often.

It brought me ease, a sense of no denial, no circumvention, no BS.

In other words: It was easier to be with my experience - and acceptance for it came organically.

=> book clarity call or directly somatic experiencing-infused coaching via dm or link in my bio. It’s about aliveness, about sensuality, about nervous system ease and trauma resolution 🐦‍🔥.

I have a vision

To accompany people into nature, where, in my experience, the nervous system regulates much more easily.

Co-regulation with nature.

Intentionally, awarefully. So the nervous system can learn to remember what that feels like. And re-organise itself, finding a new base-line.

As a child in 2nd grade, I had an episode of quite severe OCD. I remember my mum being quite worried. She went with me to people she hoped could help me. Maybe it did help.

Yet, magically (and for me now not so surprisingly anymore), the obtrusive obsessive thoughts completely disappeared after 1 FOREST-Week; one of these „special“ weeks we had every year, themed to a specific theme. In this grade, it was spending an entire week in the forest.

I will never forget this.

And today, after spending a day in nature, with movement and friends, I again was reminded of this vision of mine that I have since a few years already.

And I remembered the podcast episode of @sneakypowerful where she interviews a somatic experiencing practitioner, Cindy Brooks, who is also an „eco-therapist“ (it‘s a thing apparently) and combines nature and somatic experiencing aka intentional nervous system work.

I listen it again, and light up

❤️‍🔥

I‘m looking forward to going to nature tomorrow with a client.

Mother earth 🙏🏽 have not many of us forgotten that we belong to you? How can we gain back that knowledge better than by touching you?

💦

Thank you friends for today

📸 @marusevi.4 ❤️

Hahaa

I deleted chatgpt and then downloaded it again. It has a seductive character.

Anyways - as the trend made its rounds on IG - I asked them to „create a caricature of me and my job based on everything you know about me.“

What I love doing is not easily depictable. Not so tangible from the outside.

But from the inside, I believe it is. You will feel it. You will feel what presence makes you feel in your body. What it wakes up in you. And what it helps you lay down so you are able to rest.

It‘s something I am learning, and am glad to be reminded of - and supported in, by my environment.

Humans, animals, movement, nature.

Thank you.

🫶🏽

The death of a parent shakes up everything:
{auf Deutsch unten}

What is the meaning of life?
Why all of this [life]?
What to do with this time on earth?
What is important to me?
Did I do enough?
Did I show love enough?
Did they trust that I love them?
What did I see that was not there?
What did I not see that was there?
What does family mean?
Why does it hurt so much?
What did I make my experience mean about me?
About them?
About our relationship?
What if I have always belonged?
What if all of us, in the family, belong to the family, no matter what?
What if all of us really belong?

⚡️🤯 …just some of the questions that come up for me.

I love the gentle invitations of my somatic experiencing therapist to:
• allow every experience to be here - not trying to be positive
• keep checking in what the responses are in my body
• to stay just a little bit longer with each experience - and especially with those where I feel my inner strength, compassion and a sense of „this is right“.

Thank you, @shally_khedkar

If you‘re curious about working with somatic experiencing-infused coaching- your 1st session with me is 50% off - option to have a longer chat first.

🫶🏽

***

Der Tod eines Elternteils rüttelt alles auf:

Was ist der Sinn des Lebens?
Warum das alles [das Leben]?
Was mache ich mit dieser Zeit auf der Erde?
Was ist mir wichtig?
Habe ich genug getan?
Habe ich genug Liebe gezeigt?
Haben sie darauf vertraut, dass ich sie liebe?
Was habe ich gesehen, das gar nicht da war?
Was habe ich nicht gesehen, das da war?
Was bedeutet Familie?
Warum tut es so weh?
Welche Bedeutung habe ich meinen Erfahrungen gegeben in Bezug auf was sie über mich aussagen?
Über sie?
Über unsere Beziehung?
Was, wenn ich schon immer dazugehört habe?
Was, wenn wir alle – in der Familie – zur Familie gehören, egal was ist?
Was, wenn wir alle einfach dazugehören?

⚡️🤯 …nur ein paar der Fragen, die bei mir auftauchen.

(Geht weiter in den Kommentaren 👇🏽

6 Things about Grief (from a nervous system perspective) 👇🏽[Deutsch in den Kommentaren]

1: the body senses absence as a kind of shock. Support is essential.
2: allow grief to oscillate - cry, sigh, feel heavy, and be with moments of relief, laughter and aliveness. Cultivate safety so your system feels safe enough to move back and forth.
3: go slow! allow the body to feel just enough so it can integrate what happened.
4: follow impulses like curling inward, bowing, reaching or resting - is crucial for grief to not get stuck.
5: with presence and attunement, grief can actually expand the system‘s capacity to feel alive, be tender and in contact.
6: meaning comes after feeling the physical sensations

More unfolding see 👆🏽

An unwavering thank you to my family and friends ❤️

Anger needs inner strength and/or a competent protector

In order not to be destructive > explosion or implosion

but effective > change

This relates to healthy aggression, something many talk about these days

and what softens the grip of („toxic“) shame > being able to notice and assert one‘s boundaries.

Actually, I just wanted to show off my new shirt 😁😁😇😇

Love to the human experience 🖤

A piece of psycho-education that may help you find understanding and a bit of distance from a sometimes overwhelming experience.

Trauma healing needs a lot of light. (@matteo.morozzo 🙏 so true!)

Let‘s dance & forget about it for a while 😁

Intro to Somatic Trauma Healing 💫

An intro to trauma healing based on Somatic Experiencing™️ principles - blending theory with applied practices.

Explore with us how the nervous system moves between states of safety, activation, and shutdown—and how these states shape our actions, emotions, thoughts and relationships.🤍

🙌🏽What will we do?
This is not therapy and not a deep trauma process. It is a *gentle, practical introduction*—a way to understand the mechanics behind regulation, expansion, and embodied presence. You will *take away simple tools* to integrate into your day to day life.

🤌🏾Who is it for?
Those who wish to receive an embodied understanding the nature of trauma and its healing.

🤙🏼What is Somatic Experiencing?
A body-based approach to healing stress and trauma that works by gently restoring the nervous system’s natural capacity to regulate - rather than revisiting or analyzing past events.

Details:
📆 Friday January 9th 10.30-12.00
📍Ubud, Bali
💸 Free

DM for details.

We‘re looking forward to having you 🌷

@matteo.morozzo & @sensitivityofpresence

The greatest gift I can give myself - and my clients - is to stay curious.

I suspend the idea that I‘d know.

Tender me, during christmas days.

💮

What is presence?

This piece has been giving me peace in connection lately:

I used to think being present with the other means to be able to look into the others’ eyes and hold it for a (long) while. Or to be super attentive with what the other is saying.

Presence though can mean that I’m present with the chit-chat in my head. That I look away into the sky for a moment. That I get up and stretch. That I take a sip of water. That I take time to breathe.

Practices like eye-gazing - what was new and very revealing at the beginning of my yogic and tantric explorations - can be amazing. They can lead to softening and connection.

Yet they can also lead to the opposite if they don‘t come from authenticity;  I might look perfectly calm and present from the outside, yet be tenser and tenser inside, loosing connection to my body, attention to your body language, your words.

Only recently I’ve discovered how important it is, as requirement for me to stay present - to take care of my needs, my boundaries, which I have right at this moment. Even if that might look like disconnection, distraction, or reveal an avoidant attachment style.

It‘s that care that helps me self-regulate.
That allows me to feel myself, my internal world
- and therefore to stay present with you.

And yes - from that honoring of my needs, my ability to stay with the others’ gaze has not only been increasing but also become increasingly enjoyable.

This might be common sense for some of you - for me it’s been a game-changer.

🤍

Listening With the Skin 🎙️ - a conversation about life and dance w/ contact improvisation dancer Sebastian Flegiel

What if… dance is life and life a dance?

During 10 days learning with @sebastianflegiel I felt: I want to have a conversation with him and share it with others, as many things he expresses through presence, movement and words are inspiring to me.

Sebastian is a teacher of Contact Improvisation since many years.
Explore with us how this dance form contributes to becoming aware of the sensitivity of the body and can invite practitioners into a deeper presence with
themselves,
others
life
- nature.

The principles of
• attunement
• weight
• orientation
• responsiveness
• and shared presence
are the same foundations that support nervous system healing (which is a strong focus of mine currently).

If you’re someone who wants to feel more grounded, more alive, and more connected to yourself, I believe this conversation offers something nourishing.

Enjoy 🤸🏾‍♀️🤸🏼‍♂️🤸🏾

Pictures taken by @hey.i.cu⁠ during the 10-day contact improvisation intensive with ⁠@sebastianflegiel hosted by⁠ ⁠@unfold.ci⁠. ⁠

Thank you friends 🤍

Listen via link in my bio or directly on Spotify 🔎 @sensitivityofpresence

What did you dis-cover?

Each evening now I ask myself this question.

It‘s the question that I imagine the guardians of heaven would ask me at the portal, after I‘ve left this planet.

I tried having them ask me different things.
This one landed in my body.
I relaxed.
I felt excited - excited to tell them all I‘ve discovered in life,
excited for them to hear my stories.

So I realized: rather than worrying and being critical with myself about all the things I could have done better in the day, that could have gone better - I want to ask myself:

What did you dis-cover today?

Interesting, this life.

Thank you for being so brave and dedicating one day of the Awakened Leadership to death, @ricksmith2000 .
It was my favourite day.
Equally favorite as the other 4 days 😅.

Thanks for trusting me,
seeing me,
inviting me to assist.

Retelling is reliving…

The very nature of trauma is: too much, too fast.

Too much information, too fast for a small or big person’s system to process.

As a result, a pattern forms in the body, which repeats itself again and again in the future.

To teach the body a different response is only possible if we take it slow.
Piece by piece.
Bite by bite.
🍰

Processing of trauma does not happen if it‘s done at the same speed and intensity as the trauma happened:

Retelling,
…without slowing down
…without noticing what’s happening in the body
…without making sure that every piece of information is met with a sense of safety

is reliving. Retraumatizing - or at least consolidating stagnation.

Therefore: from a trauma-healing perspective, it doesn’t make sense to just retell a story.

Take it slow. Piece by piece. Bite by bite. Have someone guide you: Disconnection from others, and disempowerment, are the core-experiences of psychological trauma. Now you can offer what’s been missing in the past.

You can experience new responses in your physiology, emotional reality and come to new understandings.

Revisit these new realities of yours, anchor them in your system, so they get solidified - and the old patterns, they soften.

🎂

[somatic experiencing, trauma integration, trauma healing, somatic coaching, nervous system resiliency]

My body is my support if I listen to it.

It contains me, holds me, guides me.

It‘s not always easy to listen when it used to feel safer to let the mind talk instead.

It‘s a practice and step by step it‘s less like a one-way conversation and more like an actual dialogue.

💚

Thank you for helping me re-establish that dialogue @shally_khedkar.
Thank you Somatic Experiencing.
Thank you body for supporting me even if I don‘t listen.

📸 @intuitiv_snaps

Suppressing your tears - or any feeling - and just feeling tense in the body?

Maybe you know this tension, contraction in the neck that then shows up. It can be momentarily, or be here since a long time.

Here‘s one short, effective practice we use in somatic trauma healing therapy - to let go of that tension. And to create resiliency in your nervous system to experience life without going into overwhelm.

We do movements slowly (though not too slow, depends on your nervous system), to
• not go into overwhelm (which happens so swiftly without noticing often)
• notice the subtle sensations and impulses your body which guides real healing
• allow traumatic material unwind and find completion safely.

Can you feel the shift in your system? A deeper breath, more connection to the cushion beneath, natural orienting with your eyes or a burp?

Let me know how it goes 🫰🏽

support + inner strength 🪺❤️💜🐞🎈🧗🏼‍♀️

„The core experiences of psychological trauma are disempowerment and disconnection from others.
Recovery, therefore, is based upon the empowerment of the survivor and the creation of new connections.
Recovery can take place only within the context of relationships; it cannot occur in isolation...“

— Judith Herman, Trauma and Recovery

#traumahealing #nervoussystemhealing #somaticexperiencing #attachmenttrauma

Sometimes I don’t know what I’m feeling, let alone what I need.

…need so the emotions can simply flow - and do not feel overwhelming nor suppressed.

This guideline helps me:

• Anger needs the resource of > internal strength, competent protector
• Fear > safe place, competent protector
• Sadness > support
• Guilt > taking responsibility (though this can also be trauma-related or stem from parental conditioning)
• Shame > acceptance & compassion
• Freeze > slow, gentle movements, sounding from belly, orientation

Be free 🙌🏼

Save this for later as a reminder and let me know how it goes.

Pro-tip: Always try to notice the sensations in your body as you’re feeling an emotion (what sensations, where in your body?). It helps to not identify with the emotion and make it more manageable.

📸 @andrey_berezkin_photo on initiative by @karpaanastasya 🤍

#somatics #somaticexperiencing #somaticcoaching #ecosomatics

The earlier you catch dysregulation, the easier you get out of it 🎢🫂

Do you know that the following are signs of dysregulation?

freeze-smile
fatigue
hopelessness/despair
withdrawal, isolation
overwhelmed by simple tasks
shallow, rapid or irregular breathing
tight chest, throat, jaw
restlessness
anger, frustration
hypervigilance (anticipating danger)
rushing, overdoing, multitasking
difficulty sleeping
difficulty saying no
feeling invaded or exposed
holding breath
fixed gaze
tension around eyes
startle responses
…

These are perfectly human responses. Yet your system isn’t meant to be stuck in them, stay there for long.

The key is to catch dysregulation early — the earlier, the easier it is to get out of it.

This is because of how our nervous system is built: once activation goes a certain threshold, it shifts into automatic survival responses that are much harder to interrupt.

When you notice you‘re starting to get dysregulated, you may use these to get back to the here & now, your body — and to not spiral downwards into more overwhelm or eventually dissociation:

- GROUNDING - feel the weight of your body. Notice where you meet the chair. Feel the support behind you
- ORIENTATION - let your eyes explore the room, slowly. Notice shapes, colors, sounds. The relative safety of your environment
- RESOURCING - let your awareness land on something that brings you a (even small!) sense of ease, pleasure or neutrality - a memory, an image, a place, something you see right now.

Your body - your nervous system and the resulting emotions, thoughts and behaviors - is not wrong. It tries to protect you.

And you can learn to meet it with presence, curiosity, and kindness.

Every early noticing is a step toward more ease and capacity.

Welcoming questions and reflections

🤍

#somaticexperiencing #somaticcoaching

What was missing? 💕

To integrate developmental, emotional and relational trauma - an essential question to look into is: what is/was missing?

Is it support? A protector? A safe place?

Different things can act as a resource for this:

• Bringing a friend, pet or situation where the opposite quality is/was present, to memory
• The therapist‘s presence, eyes or touch
• Imagining mother‘s and father‘s support - even a whole line of ancestors
• Anything - also visualized - that works to make up for what‘s been missing (the brain cannot distinguish between real and imagined)

You know that it‘s an adequate resource when the whole body starts to resonate with it.

The body experiences safety, begins to soften, and stuck energy aka traumatic material gets a chance to find release - per example through trembling, pushing, tears, or simply a shoulder drop - and you can come to ease, a sense of wholeness and trust again.

It‘s a practice, one step at a time, especially developmental trauma has many layers to look into. It takes courage and time. Lots of safety, lots of welcoming.

🤍

📸 no 1: @intuitiv_snaps

#somaticexperiencing #somaticcoaching

„Don‘t hide your trauma“, he said

Thank you, Chirag

🫠

📸 @intuitiv_snaps

Even with unease, presence is healing 🧡

Today looking at breath and developmental trauma in the @somaticexperiencingint training - I had old „stuff“ coming up. The unease lurked within my system, even as I was about to give a session. My practice client asked me after a while: „Rahel, I just want to be with you to regulate, look into your eyes, is it ok for you?“ I responded: „Yes, it‘s ok, I want to be present with you too!“ She wasn‘t convinced: „You somehow seem not to fully be at ease right now with it. Is it really ok for you?“ I told her: „It‘s true, I‘m not fully at ease. Probably because of some trauma around being seen, I feel it now, a bit nervous, my eyes want to look somewhere else here and there. Yet I really want to be here with you, connected, even if this is happening - I‘m able to be with it.“

After a moment, she started to cry. And said: „Thank you for being honest.“ I got curious: „What‘s happening for you?“ She said: „What I did not want to go into, yet is with me currently, is that I think the person I want to talk with does not want to receive my sadness, anger and fear.
I thought you didn’t want to be with me because you seemed not at ease, but you were honest about it - and also want to be with me!
Now I think maybe I will reach out to this person.“

What an attachment-healing experience. She made a new experience and found new meaning around being welcomed. As well as me - who experienced that, despite feeling unease and fear around this fact, being honest about it led to greater connection and was meaningful. I experienced on top that even when I‘m in the role of a therapist, I can be not 100% regulated myself or „present“, and still offer co-regulation. Because in fact, I was present, with the parts of me that did not want to be present - the unease.
Together, my client and me became attuned with each other, which led to safety, a prerequisite for traumatic material to come up, to be released and to be integrated.

🧡

I‘m curious to hear what comes up for you reading this 🙏

📸 @intuitiv_snaps

💕 All of This Belongs 💕

I had a moment of fear in the past,
so that fearlessness could come at last.
Grief completes through sharing true—
I am not my emotion, it passes through.

During our triad, the moment was clear,
when Anusha walked in, then out of here.
Then I found a chocolate bar, Tamil writing in gold, a message of sweetness the universe told.

I connected with collapse, with helplessness deep, and strength that had waited began to leap. I met my rescuer—the therapist’s face,
and felt my attachment trauma’s trace.

Yet I could process, release, and see,
that story is not the core of me.
Letting go, I sank inside,
reclaimed my body, where I reside.

I’d been seeking resources far and wide,
when all I needed was inside.
And I begin to realise, soft and clear,
more people like me than I thought appear.

We really have an impact strong,
getting clearer where we belong.
Working with collapse, I see,
I can really trust in me.

And yes—we can vomit with grace on stage,
turning raw release into a sacred page.
Through every fall, each truth, each song—
I’ve learned at last: all of this belongs.

— poem composed on the basis of our group integration sharings, through the 🫟🪶 of @anuazrael & a genius poet called AI.

It is scary to be on the body. Especially when trauma has happened, it‘s easier to leave it. Yet when we stay, eventually, we feel life much more.

Grateful for completing year 2 of 3 of the Somatic Experiencing practitioner training with @efunyaki and @thewhiteelephantclinic team, on developmental/relational/emotional trauma, sexual trauma as well as natural and human provoked disaster-trauma. New and old friends, you‘ve warmed my heart. Cup filled, many times. I know better what it feels like, to have a full cup. This is embodiment. It takes practice

🙏

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